Can someone rate my essays?

[vijayallenraj123]

Hello folks,

I took the MGMAT cat tests today and this was the first time I took it under full test conditions. Can any of the instructors please rate my essays:

Analysis of an Argument:


"Over the past several years, investment in precious metals, such as gold and silver, has proven to be one of the most profitable investment strategies for our firm. Over the next decade, the demand for these metals is expected to be strong, largely driven by the economic growth of large emerging markets--China, India, and Russia. Thus, our investors are best served by increasing their exposure to precious metals to take advantage of this unique profit-making opportunity."

The argument that investors would be best served by increasing their exposure to precious metals, and investing in them is not entirely convincing. This is because the argument ignores certain crucial facts.

Firstly the argument assumes that investments in precious metals such as Gold and Silver will continue to be as profitable as it has been in the last decade. This may not entirely be true. For example, with the growth of science and technology and computers in the past decade, demand for metals such as aluminium has increased. Gold and Silver, apart from jewellery were being used in the field of semiconductors, but are now being replaced with alloys of composite metals. Industries that produce these alloys are growing by the day and investors would be served better if they considered this fact.

Secondly, precious metals are found in very low quantities all over the world. The days when alluvial gold lay scattered are long gone. Today, mining gold and silver is a very costly affair. The next decade may not see the same demand that the last decade has. Even if demands and prices increase, not a lot of people might be interested in buying these precious metals due to their high cost and low availability. They might instead prefer to switch to other alternatives. The argument neither addresses this possibility nor provides an alternative way of procuring these precious metals and assumes that the market for precious metals will remain the same.

Thirdly the argument never considers emerging industries that might be more profitable to invest in. For example in emerging markets such as China and India, manufacturing and software are two industries that account for more than 50% of revenues. Foreign direct investments and outsourcing have played a major role in the past decade, in helping these industries earn huge profits. Investors would be turning a blind eye to this fact if they considered only on precious metals.

Thus the argument is not completely sound and the evidence cited in support of the conclusion does little to prove that investing in precious metals would serve investors better.

I will post the other essay in another thread.

[StaceyKoprince]

Hi, thanks for posting your essays! Just an FYI that instructors don't grade or give feedback on essays (see the forum guidelines for details). GMAC provides an essay-grading service already (see third paragraph below for details), so we stopped offering this service.

It's possible to get responses from other community members (students), though. Just FYI - there is a separate folder for essays. If you would like to get responses from your fellow students, please post your essays in the Essays folder.

Also, if you're in our class, you'll have an opportunity to get essays graded and get written feedback during the course (after class 6). Finally, you can get essays graded by GMAT Write (the official essay grading service from the makers of the exam) - they'll both grade the essays and provide feedback as to how to improve (for a fee). For details and pricing, go to www.mba.com and search for GMAT Write.